This new relationship with Eli made me think about pacing. I have been asking myself questions like, how soon should I wait to introduce him to my grandma, is it too soon to be very intimate, is it too fast to be telling him about the drama with my group of friends, is it too soon to discuss the anxiety I have, and so on.
I really think every relationship is different, and they should all go at their own pace. But how do you find that pace and know it is right? Is it something that just comes naturally, or do we consciously decide how slow or fast to move?
My relationship with Sam moved super slow. Almost at a glacial pace. On the other hand, my relationship with Max was hot and heavy right out of the gate. There was nothing slow about that one. This makes me wonder what I would classify my relationship pace with Eli as. In the beginning it went a bit slow, it took us a while to meet, then as time went on it started to move at a pace I would consider too fast. Because of that, we slowed it down. Now, I really can say I am happy with where we are and how we are moving.
Saying that and looking back on the situation makes me believe that couples fall into a certain pace naturally, but it is up to them to decide if it is one they are comfortable with, and if they aren't comfortable they have to consciously change it. Once you get into a rhythm and routine it is very hard to naturally fall out of it. That is something that takes effort and time.
What do you all think? Can you control the pace of your relationship, or is it completely natural? We can't control everything, but I believe this is one thing we do have a little bit of power over. Until next time! Be sure to follow me on Twitter and Facebook!